Rape Is Everyone’s Problem |
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On September 20, 2009, U.S. Vice President Joe Biden welcomed representatives from a number of women's groups to his home to celebrate the 15th anniversary of the national Violence Against Women Act. Biden was quoted as saying "You've helped so many women step out of the darkness. You've helped so many young girls expect a different future, expect different treatment. This is a day to celebrate. We have so much to be proud of." On October 24, 2009, outside of a homecoming dance in the San Francisco suburb of Richmond, a 15-year-old girl spent hours being gang-raped by at least four boys who range in age from 15 to 19. Up to 20 people may have witnessed the crime, but rather than step in to prevent it, merely stood by and watched; some are said to have taken pictures of the attack. That this attack occurred should be a source of shame that in 15 years, many girls have not realized that different future Biden said was already here. The same old bogeymen have been trotted out to explain the violence. In an interview with ABC's affiliate station KGO, Richmond Police Lieutenant Mark Gagan said, "These suspects are monsters." But the "bad apples" argument does not hold up in wake of the statistics about rape. According to the U.S. Department of Justice, in 2006 (the most recent year for which statistics are available), children ages 12–19 are the most victimized by personal crimes (crimes of violence, robbery, assault, and purse snatching/pocket picking). Girls ages 12–15 were raped the most, at 52,532; girls ages 16–19 were the second-largest group of rape victims, at 35,199. Among females, these two groups of girls also experience the most threats or attempts at violence among females, at 247,065 and 261,127, respectively. A total of 10,293 boys ages 12–19 were raped in 2006. According to the FBI, rape is a vastly underreported crime. Estimates vary, but according to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN), 60 percent of rapes are never reported to police. Therefore, based on 2006's reported statistics, there may actually have been at least 140,370 girls and 14,410 boys ages 12–19 who fell victim to rape. The effects of rape are devastating and may affect a survivor for the rest of her or his life. A number of mental health effects can occur, including psychosomatic ailments, posttraumatic stress disorder, depression, flashbacks, and dissociative identity disorder. Physical consequences can include sexually transmitted infections, internal body trauma, pregnancy, and attempted or completed suicide. Clearly, there is no time to lose in reducing and eventually eliminating this horrible situation. Yet there seems to be confusion among youths and young adults about what rape is. Some young people think that if there is no physical penetration, they weren't raped; others think that if they didn't fight back, were unconscious, or were afraid to say no, they couldn't have been raped. Legal definitions vary, but it is important for our children to know that any unwanted sexual contact could be sexual assault or rape and that they have permission to speak to a responsible adult about their experience. Adolescents may be more comfortable talking to their peer group than to a parent or adult; therefore, you may want to work with your PTA to ensure that information about rape crisis centers and hotlines is available anonymously and free of charge, and publicize it to students. If your child won't come to you, she or he may be willing to listen to a peer who can counsel them to seek help by offering them this information. Be sure your child knows that law enforcement can work best on their behalf if they learn of the crime as soon after the fact as possible. State laws, the National Violence Against Women Act, and the newly passed Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act all offer legal means to prosecute rapists. It is important to address the needs of your child by approaching them at a time when they feel comfortable and in control, and asking non-judgmental questions; the use of the word "I" instead of "you" is a good way to put your child at ease. If your child is hurt, ill, or acting out in dangerous ways, you may need to intervene. Otherwise, it is better not to force to issue. Rape and sexual assault rob victims of control; to help your child recover, you may need to be patient and work within her or his timetable. And remember to take care of yourself. Rape traumatizes everyone connected with it, especially parents of victims. Watch for signs of trouble in yourself, your spouse, and your other children and be prepared to seek help. Marilyn Ferdinand is publications editor for the National PTA and the editor of Our Children, PTA's national magazine. At PTA.org
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